The Smiths–Stop Me If You Think You’ve Heard This One Before
An excerpt from my illustrated novel The Woo:
Stop & Shop’s different at night. Desperate. Shouldn’t be here when not working. You couldn’t find a more pathetic way to spend your 20th birthday. Not telling anyone it’s today. I somehow thought I’d be famous by now. Who should really be famous is Justine.
Mark holds up two cantaloupes and says: “Nina’s melons!” Ryan throws an apple. It hits Mark’s arm. Nina Lowry? Nina Lanuto? Nina Vacarri? Mark starts juggling oranges and Justine pelts him with green grapes. I’m surprised to feel responsible, like I need people to behave. How do I behave around Ryan now? He acts like nothing happened so I do too, pretending I don’t notice every little thing. I don’t want to know. Nina Scarduzio?
Mark buys a gallon of water. Justine pockets a pack of Trident. Thank God Fran’s not on. I don’t know the checkout girl. Ryan smiles at her. She has fake nails. He has no discrimination. I’m starting to feel supremely stupid.